Week Forty-something.

We had Peter for class this week. We started by dancing Forro to complete track before Pete introduced us to his patented relaxation system. It is supposed to help us limber up and prevent us from dancing in a robot-like manner - as we beginners tend to do. We start by tensing our calves and then relaxing. Tensing our buttocks - then relaxing. Tensing our torso - then relaxing. Tensing our shoulders - then relaxing. Tensing our neck (although not too much as the muscles are easy to stain) - and then relaxing. All this in about sixty seconds - its a bit like yoga only 100 times faster.

After practicing all this "patented" relaxation theory - Pete put on a Forro song with a tricky beat and told us to dance around the room with a partner while he watched to make sure we were relaxed. That made me about as relaxed as a person sitting in the dentist chair waiting for a needle. So ... sorry Pete the relaxation theory did not work.

Now I got to thinking about how I would go about relaxing and I have developed Steve's patented relaxation theory for dance. I will break it down into the basic components.

1. Ensure you have at least a couple of good stiff drinks - I recommend Vodka as it has a high alcohol content and is odourless - important when dancing close to a partner.

2. Pick a partner that is easy to lead and can anticipate your every move - ie. the imaginary partner you practice with at home in kitchen. This method also guarantees even numbers.

4. Turn out all of the lights - so no one can see you.

Steve - at home relaxing.